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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26951020">Why Can’t You See Me?</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/heartlikethat/pseuds/heartlikethat'>heartlikethat</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Zoey's Extraordinary Playlist (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst and Feels, Clueless Zoey Clarke, Drunken (Almost) Confessions, Friendship, Gen, Guess Who’s Back?? 😈, Karaoke, Pining, So. Much. Angst</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-10-12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 18:15:51</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,675</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26951020</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/heartlikethat/pseuds/heartlikethat</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Zoey didn’t realize her best friend was in love with her until she heard his heartsong. But maybe there was one night, one moment (before her powers) where she did suspect Max might have feelings for her.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>12</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Why Can’t You See Me?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>This one is <strong>heavy on the angst</strong> and the idea originated from a recent IG live where Skylar sang “Dancing On My Own” and let me tell you how much my heart <em>hurt</em> thinking about if Zoey heard Max sing that as a heartsong because she didn’t end up with him.</p><p>However, I can’t exist in a universe <em>that</em> cruel, so this takes place before season one. But um, definitely don’t read this if you want something light and fun. And if you thought you’d seen the last of Jason, think again!! (yes, I’m too lazy to conjure up a new boyfriend for Zoey)</p><p>Ian Blackwood did a cover of the song, so I’m using the lyrics from that version to better fit the narrative. I’ll link it in the end notes for anyone who wants to give it a listen.</p><p>Okay, <strong>angst ahead!</strong></p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The first thing Max noticed when he entered the crowded bar was Zoey. It didn’t come as a surprise to him because he had always been drawn to her, like a moth to a flame, ever since that very first day at company orientation.</p><p>It wasn’t her more obvious attributes that Max noticed upon their initial meeting, like her fiery red hair or the fact that she was the only woman in a room full of men. No, he noticed the way she was projecting confidence, her voice calm and clear and unwavering as she asked question after question, jotting down notes in her journal as her questions received answers. Max noticed the slight trembling of her hand as she wrote, which revealed to him that she was not nearly as self-assured as she was pretending to be.</p><p>When orientation ended and they were all set loose, Max noticed as she worried her bottom lip when everyone broke off into their own little groups and she stood there, alone and unsure. And he noticed the grateful smile that stretched across her face when he walked over a moment later, introducing himself and asking if she wanted to have lunch together.</p><p>As the years passed and their friendship solidified, Max never stopped noticing Zoey.</p><p>He noticed the small, almost imperceptible shake of her head whenever Tobin made yet another misogynistic comment or the way she would roll her eyes whenever Leif interjected his <em>many</em> thoughts and opinions into every single work meeting.</p><p>Max noticed that her shoulders would tense up whenever Joan called her into her office using <em>that one tone</em> that never meant anything good was about to happen or how her brow furrowed when she was in deep concentration, trying to pinpoint a problem in an endless wall of code.</p><p>He noticed the way her face would light up whenever he brought her a nonfat latte from the new coffee shop that had opened up, The Golden Gate Grind. It soon became his daily routine to stop by every morning before work until, one day, Zoey started accompanying him because <em>‘if you insist on bringing me coffee every day and you won’t let me pay you back, then I insist on coming with you so I can pay for my own damn coffee.’</em></p><p>And of course, Max noticed her now, the way her cheeks were flushed from the alcohol she had already consumed and the way her blue eyes were sparkling as she laughed freely at whatever her boyfriend, Jason, just said.</p><p>He noticed the curves of her lips and how the simple, dainty rings that adorned her fingers glinted when the light caught them just right as her hand wrapped around the glass of her margarita.</p><p>Max noticed as she fisted a hand in Jason’s shirt to pull him in for a kiss, smiling against his mouth as her other hand went to his hair, threading her fingers through the raven strands, holding him in place.</p><p>He noticed the way she poured every ounce of herself into that kiss, completely oblivious to her surroundings, focused only on the person in her arms.</p><p>However, he didn’t <em>just</em> notice Zoey, or things <em>about</em> Zoey, he also noticed how she made him feel. Like right now, how the sight of her kissing another man made him feel like his heart was being ripped in two.</p><p>Max’s feet carried him straight to the bar where he quickly knocked back two shots of tequila before ordering a whiskey sour and heading over to join them at the table.</p><p>Yeah, he always noticed her.</p><p>But she never noticed him.</p>
<hr/><p>Zoey couldn’t stop her eyes from scanning across the bar for what felt like the hundredth time that night because <em>where the hell was Max?</em></p><p>They had left work at the same time that day, parting ways as they headed to their respective apartments — Zoey so she could change clothes, Max to feed his cat — but surely, it didn’t take <em>that long</em> to put food in a bowl because Zoey and Jason had been at the bar for nearly an hour now.</p><p>And it wasn’t like it was a regular bar, it was <em>a karaoke bar</em>, which had been Max’s suggestion. Because drunk strangers loudly belting out their feelings? Not exactly her top choice for a fun night. If Max was going to ditch out on something that was <em>his idea</em>, well then Zoey was going to give him a piece of her mind Monday at work (or in a few hours with a very heated phone call).</p><p>She thought maybe she should feel some level of guilt that her mind kept wandering to Max, <em>her friend</em>, and she was not at all focused on whatever the hell Jason, <em>her boyfriend</em>, was talking about. But Max had been her best friend for years, a proven constant in her life, whereas Jason was a relatively new addition.</p><p>Based on her previous romantic endeavors (which had all been catastrophic in their own right), she could say with absolute confidence that Max would be around a lot longer than the man sitting across from her. Although, she did really have a good feeling about Jason, so maybe she shouldn’t already be trying to write this one off.</p><p>As that thought crossed her mind, she forced her attention to remain on the man in front of her and by the time she was downing her second margarita, she lost any hope of Max showing up at all.</p><p>Zoey found herself laughing when Jason started telling her a story from his childhood that was <em>actually funny</em> for once (or maybe the alcohol in her system made it seem more humorous than it was). At any rate, she grabbed him and kissed him because, honestly, it just felt <em>nice</em> to kiss someone again.</p><p>A few minutes later, she saw Max approaching their table and she stood up to greet him, giving him a quick hug. “Hey, look who decided to finally make an appearance.”</p><p>“Sorry I’m late,” he gave a sheepish smile and Zoey arched an eyebrow at him when she detected a hint of tequila on his breath as he held a whiskey sour in his hand.</p><p>Max only drank tequila when he was in the midst of woman troubles and Zoey couldn’t recall him mentioning being involved with anyone recently, not since his last relationship ended almost a year ago so...<em>that was interesting.</em></p><p>But it was something she would have to pry out of him later when Jason wasn’t around. Zoey highly doubted Max wanted to talk about his love life with her new boyfriend right there, chiming in.</p><p>As the night progressed, Zoey concluded there was definitely something <em>off</em> about Max. Sure, he laughed at all the right moments, but it wasn’t his normal, carefree laugh. It was the same forced laughter he gave whenever Glenn tried to tell a joke at work, taking pity on the poor coder that no one really liked.</p><p>And his eyes were a roiling storm of emotions, they held something dark and sad and...<em>complicated?</em> Zoey was no expert when it came to feelings, so she couldn’t accurately identify the <em>exact</em> emotion she saw in his eyes, but she didn’t need to be an expert to realize that it was decidedly <em>not a good one</em>.</p><p>What confused her the most was whenever he excused himself to use the restroom, Zoey watched as he made an interlude at the bar, downing two shots (of tequila, she presumed) before continuing on to his intended destination.</p><p>She was concerned, but she didn’t know how to ask Max about it. At least, not without making him feel uncomfortable.</p><p>So, she held her tongue.</p><p>And she waited, hoping that at some point in the night she would secure a moment alone with her friend.</p><p>When Max returned from his third trip to the restroom (and bar), he took one look at Zoey, his gaze drifting to where Jason’s arm was slung casually, comfortably, and protectively around her shoulders, and he smiled. A tight smile that didn’t reach his eyes. “I think I feel like singing.”</p><p>
  <em>Oh no.</em>
</p><p>It was not a secret that Max was an avid karaoke fan, often the first to take the stage on the nights Zoey <em>finally</em> caved and let him drag her to a karaoke bar with the promise he would pay for <em>‘however much alcohol it takes for you to pretend like you’re having a good time.’</em></p><p>He loved to sing and dance and put on a show for a crowd of drunk strangers, his songs upbeat, his mood exuberant.</p><p>Yeah, Max always sang.</p><p>But never like this.</p><p>A pit formed in her stomach as she watched him stagger onto the stage, a sense of foreboding settling in her chest.</p><p>She didn’t recognize the music when it started playing (when did she ever?), but it was neither upbeat nor exuberant.</p><p>
  <em>“Somebody said you got a new friend, but does he love you better than I can? There’s a big, black cloud over my town. I know where you’re at, I bet he’s around. Yeah, I know it’s stupid. I just gotta see it for myself”</em>
</p><p>Zoey was stunned. Even with the copious amount of tequila coursing through his veins, he sounded good. He sounded <em>damn good</em>, actually, and she knew she wasn’t the only one who thought so, based on the reaction of every woman (and a few men), in the packed bar cheering him on.</p><p>
  <em>“I’m in the corner watching you kiss him. I’m right over here, why can’t you see me? I’m giving it my all, but I’m not the guy you’re taking home. I keep dancing on my own. I keep dancing on my own”</em>
</p><p>As good as he sounded, however, there was no mistaking the pain in his voice and Zoey once again racked her brain, trying to think of anything or <em>anyone</em> that could have him in such a state. He looked almost like he was...heartbroken? But why? Had there been some girl he never told her about?</p><p>
  <em>“I’m just gonna dance all night. I’m so messed up, I’m so out of line. Whiskey and broken bottles, I’m spinning around in circles”</em>
</p><p>Zoey was so lost in her thoughts that she didn’t even realize that Max was staring right at her as he sang.</p><p>
  <em>“And I’m in the corner watching you kiss him. I’m right over here, why can’t you see me? I’m giving it my all, but I’m not the guy you’re taking home. I keep dancing on my own. I keep dancing on my own”</em>
</p><p>When she did finally notice his eyes were locked on her, her breath caught in her throat at the raw emotion on his face, the longing in his gaze that made her heart speed up because <em>oh shit, oh shit, this can’t be happening right now.</em></p><p>
  <em>“So far away, but still so near. The lights come on, the music dies. But you don’t see me standing here. I just came to say goodbye”</em>
</p><p>Zoey, frozen in place and unable to tear her eyes away from Max, frantically tried to analyze the situation so that it <em>made sense</em>. Why was he looking at her? Well, who else would he look at? He didn’t know anyone there, except for Zoey and Jason. So, <em>of course</em> he would choose to look at Zoey, <em>his friend</em>, while he sang. He had to look somewhere, right? Yeah, that <em>made sense.</em></p><p>
  <em>“I’m in the corner watching you kiss him. I’m right over here, why can’t you see me? I’m giving it my all, but I’m not the guy you’re taking home. And I keep dancing on my own”</em>
</p><p>And yet...why the expression on his face? How could she explain away the look of yearning and heartache? Well, <em>clearly</em>, he was staring at <em>Zoey</em>, but he <em>must be thinking of someone else</em>, no doubt the elusive woman who had apparently ripped his heart in two.</p><p>
  <em>“So far away, but still so near. The lights come on, the music dies, but you don’t see me standing here...”</em>
</p><p>As the song ended, Zoey’s eyes followed Max as he shuffled off the stage and headed straight for the exit, shrugging off the hands of women who were promising to <em>‘make him feel better’</em> and <em>‘take his mind off the bitch who broke his heart.’</em></p><p>“Um...I better go check on him. That was pretty...intense,” Zoey found herself saying distractedly, her attention on the door where Max had disappeared mere seconds ago.</p><p>“Yeah, of course, babe. Want me to come with?”</p><p>“No, that’s okay. I’ll be right back.” She gave Jason a quick kiss before hurrying after Max, hoping to catch him before he left.</p><p>Zoey breathed a sigh of relief when Max was just outside the bar, leaning against the brick wall with his eyes closed.</p><p>“Max...” she said cautiously, “are you...alright?” She leaned back against the wall next to him, close enough that she could feel the heat radiating from his body.</p><p>“Yeah, Zo, I’m good. I don’t know what happened back there.”</p><p>“Seems like some girl really did a number on you,” she half joked, but there was no denying the concern in her voice.</p><p>“What makes you think that...<em>that</em>...was about a girl?”</p><p>“The tequila, the song, literally your entire demeanor right now,” she listed off matter-of-factly.</p><p>Max peered down at her, his lips curving up slightly. “Who says you suck at feelings? Maybe you’re not quite so oblivious, after all.”</p><p>“Wow, thanks,” she gave him a wry smile. “So, who is it? Do I know her?”</p><p>At that, his smile faltered. “No, definitely still oblivious.” His voice was barely a whisper, but Zoey heard him and her face fell.</p><p>“Oh no. Did you already tell me about her and I wasn’t <em>actually</em> paying attention? Was it the day Tobin wouldn’t stop talking to me in Dothraki because I swear I heard him say ‘vikeesi’ which I looked it up and I’m pretty sure it means ‘annoying woman’ and then he muttered something about a <em>flesh wound</em> and I know he was just trying to mess with me because he’s Tobin and he’s harmless, but still...” she trailed off, realizing she was getting off track. “I’m sorry, but hey, I need to know who she is so I can hack into her computer and give her a virus. So, what’s her name?”</p><p>Max gave her a searching look, the longing in his eyes from earlier returning, almost burning her with their intensity. When he grabbed her hand, she gasped.</p><p>“Zoey...” he said her name softly, with significance, shifting his body so he was facing her.</p><p>But.</p><p>
  <em>No, he couldn’t possibly mean that...that she, Zoey, was the girl...or did he...?</em>
</p><p>“I think...” Max murmured, his gaze drifting down to her mouth and Zoey felt her heart pounding in her chest as Max started to lean toward her.</p><p>
  <em>No. No no. No no no no no. No. No. No.</em>
</p><p>Things were going so well with Jason. It was...easy, fun, uncomplicated.</p><p>
  <em>Please, Max, your friendship is too important, please don’t ruin this special thing we have.</em>
</p><p>He must have noticed Zoey’s wide eyes or noticed the panic that was written all over her face because he abruptly dropped her hand and pulled away with a sigh. “I think I should go home.”</p><p>“Right, sure, of course,” her voice was faint as Max was already on his phone, requesting a ride home.</p><p>Zoey stood there, long after Max had gone, trying to process <em>what the hell</em> just happened so that it <em>made sense.</em> Because her best friend almost kissing her certainly didn’t <em>make sense</em> to her.</p><p>In the end, she convinced herself that she imagined the whole thing — the look in his eyes, the delicate way he held her hand, the way he said her name.</p><p>Yeah, maybe she didn’t completely believe the bullshit she told herself.</p><p>But it was better if she pretended she did.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>One day I will <em>get a life</em>, but until then I’ll just keep writing whatever’s floating around in my brain.</p><p>And here’s the link I promised!</p><p>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ToeQEkQ0udo&amp;list=RDToeQEkQ0udo&amp;start_radio=1</p></blockquote></div></div>
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